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Magical Meals turn your dungeon crawl into a feast!

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Adriaen van Ostade - Feasting Peasants in a Tavern

A mysterious figure known only as the Culinomancer, is a widely travelled individual of renowned skill. Their stated purpose? To create delicious and magical food from every known monster that can be considered edible.

The Culinomancer’s collected writings are popular among a certain niche group of adventurers. Some are interested in the magical benefits such dishes provide. Others are fringe epicureans, seeking pleasure in devouring the rarest, most exotic, and even dangerous food. Whoever this Culinomancer may be, they know their craft. The recipes are powerful aids to adventures, and typically very tasty.

Dragon Roast

The trick to cooking dragon is the marinade. Dragon is a tough meat, and you want to tenderize it. The marinade does this, provides flavor, and helps with digestion.

Dragon meat can be hard on the delicate guts of many humanoids. Normally, you want to cook it slowly to improve the texture and flavor. However, adventurers don’t often have the luxury of time and controlled low temperature, so get it done with high heat and allow the marinade to work its magic. The extra char is also a nice addition to the overall flavor profile.

Dragon is best fresh, but you don’t have to eat it right away. One thing most people don’t know is that it takes dragons a lot longer to decompose than most creatures. It’s probably due to their highly magical nature. A dragon corpse can still be largely intact months after death, assuming scavengers don’t get at the body. The longer it sits though, the more gamey it gets. Again, another reason why the marinade is essential.

When done, allow the meat time to rest, so the juices redistribute. Dragon meat is tricky enough without letting all the moisture run out when you cut into it and having to eat it dry, no matter how flavorful it might be.

Side tip: Don’t throw away the bones. You’ll want to brew a broth from those. Trust me. Some stories say that if you bury the teeth, they sprout as soldiers, but I’ve never seen it happen.

New Magic Item: Dragon Roast

Potion, Very Rare             6,000 gp

This marinated, fire-roasted meat provides a hearty meal for up 4 creatures of up to Medium size, or leaner portions serve up to eight. If consumed during a short rest, the invigorating powers of the roast grant the diners the effects of a long rest instead.

If a creature consuming the dragon roast suffers no adverse conditions and is at full hit points, it also gains 2d10 temporary hit points and advantage on CON saves for the next 8 hours. If eating a lean portion, the diner gains 1d10 temporary hit points and advantage on CON saves for the next 4 hours.

Dragon Roast Substitute*

In the event that no dragon meat is available, some have reported success substituting steak or venison in this recipe.

Ingredients

  • London broil (or top round steak or flank steak), 2 lbs. (Remember: this isn’t dragon meat. Make sure it’s fresh, or at least freshly thawed from the freezer. Whatever cut you use, it should be at least 2 inches thick, to ensure proper doneness.)
  • 1/4 cup olive oil
  • 1/4 cup soy sauce
  • 1/4 cup ketchup (This recipe calls for tomato ketchup. Dwarves and gnomes often use a mushroom ketchup, and some humans and elves in more tropical climes prefer banana ketchup. I encourage experimentation with such variants, just try the original recipe first.)
  • 2 cloves of garlic, minced
  • 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
  • 1/4 teaspoon baking soda (Optional. If you want to ensure your meat is extra tender, sprinkle this on the beef and let it sit in a refrigerated box of some sort for 15 minutes. Then rinse with cold water and pat dry with a paper towel before applying the marinade.)

Preparation and Cooking

1. Combine all ingredients except the meat in a small bowl. Whisk well.

2. Trim any visible fat from the meat.

3. Pour a portion of the marinade into the bottom of a shallow glass dish. Place meat on marinade and pour the remaining mixture over the top, coating evenly. Cover and refrigerate for at least 3 hours. A long rest (about 8 hours) is best. Up to 12 is acceptable. Flip the meat at least once during the marination process.

4. Grill or broil the meat until an internal temperature of 135° F (57° C) is reached. (About 15 minutes under a broiler. Be sure to flip the meat halfway through the cooking process.)

5. Remove from heat and allow the meat to rest for 10 minutes before cutting into it.

6. Slice the meat to your desired thickness, on an angle and against the grain.

7. Serve over rice, pasta, or with roasted baby red potatoes. (The juices left in the broiler pan may be thickened into a sauce for the meat and any sides.)

*Note: While approximating the taste, texture, and appearance of an actual dragon roast, this alternate recipe is not purported to grant any magical effects. A full tummy and satisfied tastebuds are to be expected, however.



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